Such a simple task I was given, a fun one even, but I found myself wondering the aisles of CVS with my brain and heart pinging against each other. Will I ever be the same? Will I ever be able to go back? I’m not sure. I think I’m ruined. The conundrum that plagued me; buying makeup. But not just buying everyday makeup. Buying makeup for girls who have been rescued from sex-trafficking. What a fun opportunity to get to bless these young women who have endured horrible, inexcusable pain. So I walked in and my typical cheap, uber money-conscious self walked straight to the dollar shelf. My hand was practically hovered over a $2 foundation when I heard myself wonder “Would you buy that for myself?” There are many cheap things that I willingly don on a regular basis. But foundation is not one of them. We women know the perils of cheap foundation. Dry, cake-y, streaky, nightmares upon our skin. The chance of a breakout alone is not worth the pretty price tag. The answer was no. No I wouldn’t wear it. So why would I so willingly get it for someone that I would consider “less fortunate.” If the second commandment is “Love your neighbor as yourself,” (Mark 12:31) then why do I willingly jump to the cheap rack? So that I can get more things and feel better about myself? I could buy 5o things for $50 or I could buy 12 higher quality items for the same. Why would I pick the former as the best option?
I blame Jen Hatmaker. Her book “7” has put me to thinking about every move that I make. I already made the decision not to get pajamas at H&M for these girls. The idea of buying clothes from a sweatshop for girls who were rescued from similar situations seemed a bit counterintuitive. How can I justify the celebration of freedom when it another is still in bondage? Ouch. So many jabs in the gut over this. It’s a balance and yet it’s not. I could go crazy over each purchase I make wondering the ramifications of my decisions. Or I could just be more conscious about the decisions that I do make. Sometimes being a good steward doesn’t just mean being a good steward of finances. Sometimes it means being a good steward of time, relationships, and choices.
The book “7” taught me to be a conscious consumer as well as a conscious Christian. How am I hurting when I want to help? How are my decisions effecting others. What can we all do to love our neighbor in the same way that we love ourselves?
(Side note: I highly recommend the book “7” by Jen Hatmaker to you. But be forewarned that you will clean out your closets and inevitably become a crazy person by world’s standards)